FUNNY FRIDAY: Nigel Farage celebrates

On the second edition of Funny Friday, I decided to use this picture of UKIP leader Nigel Farage. My favourite caption was: “My wife is spending too long letting the cat in: Time to criticise her open door policy” by Ollie

See my other favourite captions below and feel free to add your own in the comments!

Mr Farage

  • “At the YMCA…” (John)
  • “I’d walk a million miles for one of your smiles ooohhh maaammy.” (Leroy)
  • “With all the bloody immigrants in this country we only have this much space left, they have even nicked my teeth to make room to live” (Steve)
  • “Subways invisible sub! Keep your greed a secret, until your belly gets too big. Sponsored by UKIP!” (Joe)
  • “The EU want to standardise the great British chip. In future each chip will be this size” (Steve)
  • “Oh my goodness, Mr Blooby is real” (Paula)
  • “We’re saved,I’ve just found a pound coin down the back of the couch.” (Colin)
  • “The sausage for breakfast i had on expenses was this big!” (Carl)
  • “Pinocchio Cameron’s nose is how big?” (Kevin)
  • “I remember the days before the EU when sardines were this big” (Richard)
  • “That Bruce Lee? I could’ve had him. Here, watch this!” (Sal)
  • “If I do this it will take the minds of my hideous tie” (Mark)
  • “This is how much of the NHS I am going to sell off ..to erm foreign speculators ..this is how big a traitor I really am ..up with the rich” (Robert)
  • “This is the measure of the EU’s foresight, saints preserve us.” (Barrabus)
  • “Oh no!….I’M an immigrant” (Kalika)
  • “A wad of money being taken from the UK by the EU is this big, every day.” (Travis)
  • “Stop controlling me from behind, I only look a dummy!” (Tanya)
  • “I only eat British. Here’s my British baguette, with….. oh wait.” (Gavin)
  • “My MEP expense accounts has more Euros than Labour’s got members” (Richard)
  • “This giant invisible Toblerone chunk is eye-wateringly good.” (Sal)
  • “Watch out Nige there’s a left wing looney with a camera over there.” (John)
  • “Help me catch my payrise. It’s huge” (Antony)
  • “The wedge of cash I swizzled from the EU was this big.” (Kevin)
  • “It’s a great day to be alive, I passed the drugs test and found my unicorn…” (Richard)
  • Just had a revelation, “I’m such an idiot !” (John)
  • “Where did this Corbyn guy come from?” (Carol)
  • “And all my voters combined were this big!” (Jennifer)

And ,of course, there were a few pig jokes!

  • “The pig’s head was this big!” (Alan)
  • “And I swear the pig’s mouth was this big” (Bob)
  • “Totally disgusting 2 pigs in the same bed! YUK” (Malcolm)
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